Dani Mathers, Britt McHenry To Get Reality Show On “Bravo”

Dani Mathers and Britt McHenry

Dani Mathers and Britt McHenry team up to tell men and women what’s wrong with them, visually. Coming soon to Bravo, the network that used to show operas.

New York—You can’t keep a Playmate of the Year down for long. Just weeks after being forced to delete all of her social media accounts after posting a photo of an older, unattractive woman taken without the woman’s consent inside her gym locker room, Dani Mathers has been given her own reality show alongside ESPN sideline reporter Britt McHenry. The two women will host a show called, “Shame to Fame” where they will “use their unique and undeniable talents to turn uggos, fatsos and terribly unattractive human beings into good looking men and women.”

“It can not be argued that both of these beautiful, talented women with their pull-no-punches, take-no-prisoner attitudes have a knack for focusing in on basic flaws of other people, women especially,” a spokesperson for Bravo said. “And we thought they could use their skill in delivering constructive criticism to all the poor schlubs out there who need a good dose of reality so they don’t waste their time thinking they fit into a good-looking society.”

The show will begin filming next month, with a tentative launch date set for mid-December.

“Just imagine sitting down with the family at Christmas to watch a wholesome helping of reality where these ladies spew their thoughts on how ugly the people they encounter are,” a Bravo statement read. “We just hope we don’t have to blur out everybody we put on the show. You never know.”

“Britt and I are just really, really excited to help out the poor people out there who don’t know how hideous they are,” Mathers said on both her Twitter and Instagram accounts. “We are assuming that the losers we’ll be helping really appreciate what we are doing for them, unlike the a-holes (sic) at my gym.”

McHenry echoed her future co-host’s sentiment, posting on her Facebook page, “We’re on TV, huney (sic). We know what it takes and who has what it tkes (sic) to make it in the business. We’re natural choices to be in this show. We can’t wait!”

TDQ Tech For The Week Of 11/12/12

The GrinderyThis week’s TDQ Tech features a Grindery article written by that Facebook cat, that Mark Zuckerberg dude. He actually makes tons of sense in this commentary, too. Who knew?

Man, we really wish we’d known that the sensible thing would be for him to take a break from Facebook. We totally would have never thought of that ourselves. Too bad we de-friended like 58 people leading up to the election. Oh, well. They were all jerks anyway.

You are now technologically informed. Go and do likewise.

TDQ Tech For The Week Of 11/5/12

The GrinderyThis week’s TDQ Tech features a Grindery piece about the wonders of technology helping take some selfish idiot off the road. I’m sure if Steve Jobs hadn’t faked his own death last year, he would applaud his technology having a hand in helping bring to justice such lowlife driving scum. Fantastic work.

You are now technologically informed. Go and do likewise.

Facebook, The Internet Ruining The Joy, Dread Of Actual Reunions

Reunion 2012

Reunion traditionalists claim that the experience of a physical reunion can’t be recreated on Facebook. Anti-reunionists claim that the reunion of the future reduces an individuals carbon footprint significantly.

Chicago—This typically is the time of year when people are attending their high school reunion, but thanks to Facebook and other social networking sites, many companies that would be busy now helping plan and put on reunions are seeing a decidedly downward turn in business.

“Facebook is to the high school reunion business what Walmart is to mom and pop stores,” said Maggie Tabet, owner and founder of Reunite Us, the nation’s third-largest reunion organization company. “They’re insidious. Insidious. I can only imagine that Mark Zuckerberg and his gang have no interest in going to their high school reunions, but if they did, we can help organize them. Those jerks.”
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TDQ Tech For The Week Of 5/28/12

The GrinderyThis week’s TDQ Tech brings you a Grindery piece about T-Mobile starting to strangle or throttle or something and a piece about the Facebook founder guy who got screwed by Zuck going off about getting screwed again.

Dude needs to chill out. We’d happily take .07% worth of Facebook. Of course, by the time you finished reading this sentence, that value has plummeted.

You are now technologically informed. Go and do likewise.