If you read the right websites (like we do), or even if you read the wrong websites (like we do), then you’ve come across the latest exciting “Star Wars” news involving some long-lost “footage” of Yoda exonerating Obi-Wan Kenobi of not telling Luke the truth about his parentage.

The Facebook page  has been posting snippets with this “footage,” a short clip at a time, and in doing so, has put on the web a cut scene where Yoda is yammering on and on while on his death… area in his hut/cave thing. And he supposedly tells Luke that Obi-Wan would have spilled the beans about Vader SPOILER ALERT being Luke’s deadbeat Force-choking father long before now if Yoda had only let him.

The footage also is supposed to prove that George Lucas had addressed the whole issue of why Obi-Wan was so lousy at providing details that were shown in the “prequel” trilogy.

But we have to call BS, George. Nice try, but do you really think that we Fan Boys are going to forget how miserably you’ve treated us the past 20 years and how you’ve sullied your reputation and alienated your fan base with your re-releases and bonuses and Hayden Christensen insertions? Nope.

And no “newly discovered revelations” about how you had filled one of perhaps the LARGEST PLOT HOLES IN THE HISTORY OF CINEMA is going to repair the damage you’ve done.

Not that we believe for one second that this footage is legit. We know that Skywalker-Disney Ranch has the capability to alter any dialogue that may show up on in a Laserdisc. If this line from a Yoda soliloquy were really written and filmed 30 years ago, why are we just hearing about it now? Why wasn’t it put into the re-release in the 90s, when George was polishing up and “completing” the saga?

Because it didn’t exist then. Funny thing about dialogue spoken by a puppet. Lucas didn’t even have to worry about lip-readers deciphering the true line uttered. Ol’ Frank Oz could just as easily have uttered that line six months ago after a jaunt up to San Fran from LA in a hastily-arranged rendezvous set-up by the Disney folk in an effort to restore Lucas’ image after they bought the rights to Chewie and Lando and the whole gang.

We aren’t fooled here at The Daily Quarterly, George. We don’t believe for a second that this line was part of the original script. And you can stop trying to win us over again anyway.

That Millennium Falcon has sailed, pal.

You are now informed. Go and do likewise.